“And when I think of my youth
I think of my freedom
And when I think of my freedom
I feel so alone
And when I feel lonely
I want you to hold me
Hold me in your arms”
-Anais Mitchell


I’m full of smoke and nicotine
I never expected to be this person
didn’t think I’d be just like my mother
albeit more content
I wonder what dad would say


I keep leaving blood stains on all my clothes
calling it femininity
washing off intruding voices


I probably drink too much
but I love just enough
towing lines of good and bad

who am I
who am I
I wasn’t expecting-
I don’t know if I ever could expect myself

this self that I hold dear
self that wants only to bring goodness


oh we are so many things
you and I
and we are the same
flecks in sunlight
hands full of dirt
that’s all



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anxious 20-something in new england busy finding meaning in other peoples houses critics welcome

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